That said...
Here are some quotes from students of mine:
"How do you spell Miley Cyrus?"
I laughed so hard that question was being asked it took everything to actually get it together and answer her.
"Why is for you 'baby' deal-breaker?"
I went on a rant to my students how I HATE when couples call each other "baby" and how that is a deal-breaker for me. I wrote the new vocab. word "deal-breaker" on the board and explained it. Yet, one student had missed the details of the story and then asked that.
"I am went at 3 p.m. to Nina's to make a pajama party."
We were playing the game Alibi and this was one girl's story. A classic. The story went on to tell how they went to McDonalds in the pajamas and watched all of the Harry Potter movies but skipped the "scary" parts.
"What is your favorite shampoo?"
I was teaching with the little kids, i.e. first year of English, for the first time. They had prepared questions to ask me. This was a funny favorite of mine.
"Do you like assasaurs? (pronounced ass-ah-sores)"
This is from the same class of first year students. So I have to give her props for trying to be adventurous. What she was trying to say was "Do you like accessories?".
"Our teacher is only always confused."
To be fair, I kind of agree with them. I teach with something like 17 or 18 teachers and she is by far the least organized.
"I drive today with the bus to school."
My students do this so often, it has become one of my pet peeve mistakes. It's perfectly logical for a German speaker, but still.
"I am writing a test for my teacher."
No, the teacher is not helping the student cheat by allowing them to write the test for themselves and their classmates. In German there is the same word for "take a test" and "write" a test. This is easily confused, even among teachers. I have just gotten used to it. So much so, that it doesn't even really sound wrong anymore.
"What means?"
Instead of "What does ____ mean?" This is also super common.
In a lesson on 2012 and whether or not it will be better than 2011, students had to fill out a chart. On of the columns dealt with their hopes for this year in a variety of categories. Here were the class responses:
You- I hope I pass my exams.
Austria-I hope Austria has happiness.
Earth-I hope there is no rain in the Summer.
War- I hope there is peace in the world.
Spoken just like pageant girls.
And now for quite possibly the best one...
The lesson was on the Occupy Wall Street protests and a variety of provacative pictures, cartoons, and photos from both sides of the debate were used to get them talking. One group had a political cartoon in support of the protesters and their other photograph was of a sign taken at the protest.
They were given the following two pictures:
And their summary included this:
"The protesters are being arrested not the executives. However, Obama is not like Jesus."
There are more. Unfortunately, I can't always remember what they were by the end of the day. Just trust that my days are very entertaining.
Okay, this is hilarious! I have had a few years of German and I understand the problems in "logically" saying things in the other language. Their summary of those cartoons is awesome. Haha!
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